A short but sweet tale of colors and apologies. Given,taken and the ones never received.
Time has a funny way of grabbing you by the hair and teaching you lessons through the years doesn’t it? I didn’t used to be completely black or white. I was never sharp or candid nor was I ever straight forward. I would mask things in color. Being too shy to be black or white. I really was underdeveloped.
I had found myself in rougher parts of the world. Perhaps the corners who knew only black and white to be the way of surviving. I learned to walk this walk and talk this talk. No longer hiding behind grey-er areas, the yellows, the reds nor the blues. I learned. And learned. Until all I knew was to be honest. About what I wanted, what I needed or what I felt. Most specially, who I am. And to be honest, it felt good for once.
I found myself thinking off the ones I held the truth from. All the people and reams..My dreams! The truth from myself and the people from my past. I found myself closing doors I once left open years ago, to halt the arrogant draft from blowing onto old wounds. I too received apologies I once waited so long for and thought would never come.
The most important one of all was to the girl who hid behind the yellow smiles.. And the baby blue smirks. I apologize for shunning out your dreams to make way for others’. I apologize for not having put you first. Your goals. Your ambitions. Your passions. Your growth. I apologize for not listening enough because I was too busy hearing what everyone else had to say. I apologize for having been too scared to defend you, too worried what everyone else might think. I apologize for leaving you behind along with the colors you loved. Forgotten. Merely a memory.
As for the ones never received, I’ve learned to forgive and close those as well.
The truth is, you can have both. You can be bright, bold and patterned, and still be black and white. Whether the world likes you for it or not, in all honesty, you can rock all the colors without hiding a single thing.